That Drifting Excrement Was Far Too Symbolic! These Are the TV Letdowns of the Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the television offerings of the recent year, a selection of shows emerge not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. From awkward sequels to confusingly bad documentaries, here are the programmes that left us utterly bewildered or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this divisive spin-off? Plagued with woeful writing, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show struggled to justify its existence. For a moment, as the final season began, it looked like it had finally found its groove. Then came an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator announced this would be the final series. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was simply too on-the-nose. Yet, viewers undeniably found joy dissecting every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – twirled around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a little sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? Of course she can’t.’

But that was almost the least of this drama's issues. The recipient of a very rare zero star review, it was hard to know where to start enumerating the flaws. The hilariously wooden dialogue? The tedious veneration of affluence and consumption? The seemingly deliberate procession of cliches? Performances so bad they felt borderline spiteful? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and forget about this series again. Except, a new season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Given the legal troubles, domestic violence claims and parental failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d truly have known it from this three-part docuseries which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while struggling to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this volatile personality was being pandered to, so any pity this series might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charismatic but dismissive egotist.

The Iris Affair

Naturally we knew it was preposterous from the outset: a drama about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of pure love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely cared when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call admitting defeat.

MobLand

Shady characters meeting in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a little old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to accommodate baffling accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just really boring; a dispute over narcotics territory between various London rogues which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the degree to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s temptingly easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into twee lifestyle as deliberate statements. But then you watch them and are forced to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine come to life; a meme for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental sayings and pointless crafting “hacks” you’ll forget instantly. All underpinned by vast, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, self-image, self-acceptance. But for some reason, this three-part series opted not to say them. Instead, the viewing was like reading a sales brochure. She obviously has every right to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she didn’t do herself any helps with this cagey non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even more extravagant, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too confusing to detail what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

Too Much

How do you succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of celebrity friends involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart inclusion of gifted emerging comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar irate mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lumbering from strangely breezy, somewhat mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A total mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We admire the star … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This globe-trotting thriller about government agencies spying on – and killing off – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This hagiography followed the content creator renowned for sexual escapades as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was way more interrogation of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who showed up to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and absolutely no interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a young daughter too.